My Grandpa
I'm writing this right before bed. That means I've been up for 18 hours now and nothing good comes from being tired. Except for sometimes a good nights sleep.
I have had the worst feeling in my gut today. In part because of the PMS, but its more than that. There's so much going on right now. My family is super stressed and I'm feeling like I should do more.
My grandpa is 87 years old. He's lived with my parents for a few years now because he can't do everyday stuff for himself. Well on Saturday my mom was feeding Ethan when my sister told her to come quick because somethings wrong with grandpa. He was having a heart attack. My mom rushed him to the hospital and he's been in ICU since. He also has pneumonia. I've never been very close to my grandpa. I've always respected him and used to love going to his house to play with his golf balls, but I think kids make him nervous. I've been going to the hospital everyday to be with my mom. I see her face when grandpa tries to cough or when there's a report from the doctor and it breaks my heart. My mom and dad have adapted their home for grandpa, so I know its weird to go home and not have him there. As of right now nobody knows what will happen. He's got damage to his heart. His kidneys aren't functioning. He's can't talk. Just mumble. He won't eat much at all. I went in the room with him today and said "hi grandpa." He mouthed the word hi to me. He asked me how I'm doing. The took my hand and tried to put it to his mouth to kiss it. Then he held onto it for a while. That was a cool moment for me. I felt like we bonded and I stood there and held his hand until he let go. I've been praying for him a lot. Maybe I'm totally making this up, but I'd swear it happened. I told him that he looks better and he mouthed something to me. I thought it was "I'm not ready to die." Wow. How scared does he have to be right now? He doesn't want to be in that bed. in fact they had to restrain him. I saw the nurse talk him out of trying to leave the room for about 10 minutes yesterday. My heart hurts for him because he feels like he's strong on the inside, but it just cannot come out right now.
On Thursday my Nee Naw is going in to have her kidney removed. I've been praying for her a lot lately, too. I love my Nee Naw more than she knows and I know that she will pull through this with flying colors. She's so strong and I admire that. I love you Nee Naw. (She reads this sometimes).
I have had the worst feeling in my gut today. In part because of the PMS, but its more than that. There's so much going on right now. My family is super stressed and I'm feeling like I should do more.
My grandpa is 87 years old. He's lived with my parents for a few years now because he can't do everyday stuff for himself. Well on Saturday my mom was feeding Ethan when my sister told her to come quick because somethings wrong with grandpa. He was having a heart attack. My mom rushed him to the hospital and he's been in ICU since. He also has pneumonia. I've never been very close to my grandpa. I've always respected him and used to love going to his house to play with his golf balls, but I think kids make him nervous. I've been going to the hospital everyday to be with my mom. I see her face when grandpa tries to cough or when there's a report from the doctor and it breaks my heart. My mom and dad have adapted their home for grandpa, so I know its weird to go home and not have him there. As of right now nobody knows what will happen. He's got damage to his heart. His kidneys aren't functioning. He's can't talk. Just mumble. He won't eat much at all. I went in the room with him today and said "hi grandpa." He mouthed the word hi to me. He asked me how I'm doing. The took my hand and tried to put it to his mouth to kiss it. Then he held onto it for a while. That was a cool moment for me. I felt like we bonded and I stood there and held his hand until he let go. I've been praying for him a lot. Maybe I'm totally making this up, but I'd swear it happened. I told him that he looks better and he mouthed something to me. I thought it was "I'm not ready to die." Wow. How scared does he have to be right now? He doesn't want to be in that bed. in fact they had to restrain him. I saw the nurse talk him out of trying to leave the room for about 10 minutes yesterday. My heart hurts for him because he feels like he's strong on the inside, but it just cannot come out right now.
On Thursday my Nee Naw is going in to have her kidney removed. I've been praying for her a lot lately, too. I love my Nee Naw more than she knows and I know that she will pull through this with flying colors. She's so strong and I admire that. I love you Nee Naw. (She reads this sometimes).
Add a Comment
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Comment by Toni on September 10, 2009 at 8:45pm - Praying for you and your family. I also am glad you were able to bond with your Grandpa. What a special moment. Best wishes.
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Comment by Denise Hueber on September 10, 2009 at 6:56am - Shanon - you are surrounded by prayers and love - your family is being blanketed.
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Comment by Jenny on September 9, 2009 at 7:14pm - Shanon you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I have spent the last 2 days in the hospital with my dad because he had to get a pacemaker installed. I take care of him and he is only 54. I'm so glad you were able to feel bonded with your grandpa at that moment. My heart goes out to ya Shanon. I hope things improve and, again, you're in my prayers.
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Comment by Carrie on September 9, 2009 at 12:21pm - Oh, shanon. I am so sorry, and for your mother. I just lost my dad a little over a month ago. It was not expected he was only 57, way too young i'm 35 and i feel i am too young to not have my daddy. i could have never prepared myself for the hurt that I felt, that I am still feeling, my heart is so so heavy at time, it is unbearable. Now my grandma is dying. My mom takes care of her, she has a weak heart, there is nothing they can do for her, but to keep her comfortable. She will be 75 Oct. 27,, but next week the whole family is getting together to celebrate her birthday early, because you never know when, it is so heart breaking. You are awesome to be with your mom right now. I will be praying for you and your family. Hugs!!!!!!!!!!
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Comment by Heather Jo is Team Edcob!! on September 9, 2009 at 10:49am - You and your family are in my prayers.
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Comment by Maria on September 9, 2009 at 8:11am - Shanon I am sorry for what your family is going through. It is hard to see the people you love the most when they are suffering or inconsolable. There isn't much you can do for them but be there to listen. I hope your grandfather finds peace.
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