Girls are going to automatically think that we waited until the last-minute to get them cards and candy. Because we do. There is nothing wrong with that. One benefit from this strategy is that it takes you much less time to find the perfect card at the last-minute because most of the mushy cards are gone. Save time…Wait!

Also, I recommend that you get the envelope a little dirty as you are leaving the drug store on Feb 14th to make it look like you have had it for days. One way to do this is to run over it with your car tire and tell her you dropped it in the street and had to dodge traffic to retrieve it. She will appreciate that you risked your life, thusly, give you extra lovin!

SIDENOTE: Get an extra Valentines card and put it in your glove box and just address it to: “Baby”——This will get you out of a bind if you forget one of your girls.

big-al-blog-pic-020515Order your flowers now and have them delivered by next Monday or Tuesday.

This will get you the jump on every other dude in the world and will also save you $50 off of the Valentine’s Day prices. Never EVER order multiple flower arrangements from the same florist! This is a recipe for disaster.

If you have a side piece, lay the ground work now and let her know that you are gonna have the kids next Saturday, a business trip, flag football game, rectal exam, something… so she is not looking for you on Valentine’s Day.

If you are taking your side piece out early, as a good player should, either take your homeboy’s car, rent a car, or take public transportation. Do not risk the “Sidepiece Pre Holiday Set Up.” This is when your side piece gets in your car and leaves what is (commonly known as HR…Hoochie Residue) in your car for your real woman to find. Ex: hair, lipstick, tampon, etc… Ultimately, ruining your real Valentine’s Day with your main girl.

I hope these tips help my players out there! Happy Valentine’s Day.