Nothing is better than having a minor emotional meltdown after working out
(for various reasons), going home and making the executive decision that
since I am trying to lose weight and skip dinner most nights of the week-
chill out that’s what works for ME, climbing into bed at 6:45 p.m. and
reaching for my laptop then realizing…where the hell is my laptop. For the
first time in the history of my adult life, my apartment is spotless and it took
about 5 minutes to determine that the laptop slash my ENTIRE LIFE was
not on the premises. Nor was it in the car. No way I was that out of it that I
left it at work?! It’s like my right hand and I am really not in the market for
buying another 1,500 dollar MacBook Pro. My roommate, being the best
person I’ve ever met in my life, wouldn’t let me drive since I had taken an
ambien, so she was late to dinner just so we could drive all the way to the
studio and see if my laptop was here. I walked in on another group of radio
hosts, recording their late show and AHA! It was like the red sea
parting…too dramatic? ok. Anyways, my laptop was right at my mic spot.
How am I this mentally drained at 28 years old that I’m starting to leave the
most important thing in my life at work? I suppose work is the most
important thing in my life, so it actually makes quite a bit of sense. The next
issue was the mascara stains on my face from the leftover makeup from
the morning that hadn’t been washed off. When, the host of the late
country show started chatting us up and asked me to take a picture, of
course I couldn’t say no but I can guarantee I never looked worse. I
undoubtedly looked worse than any walk of shame ever. I would go as far
as to say that I looked more beat than Rihanna after that car ride with Chris
Brown. I don’t remember much of the conversation with them since the
ambien kicked in and Holly drove home so she could get to her dinner. I
proceeded to immediately fall into bed, clutching that laptop and then using
my Sephora gift card from Christmas, I purchased 200 dollars worth of the
best reviewed skin care products on the market. Looking at myself in the
mirror at that juncture really encouraged me to start spending money on
my skin. That aside, I noticed I got a tweet from a fellow Dish host in
another city and that started the always a good idea, ambien tweet
session. For those of you reading this and judging me for mypharmaceutical fandom, just stop right there. I would prefer the holistic approach as well, but the hours that we work are unnatural. Combine that with the fact that I am a very firm believer in science, prescription meds work and that’s undeniable. However, I don’t condone ambi-tweeting or ambi-gramming. Time to take a look at what I wrote last night….