SWAT Team called to Ashton Kutcher’s house!

Heidi Montag’s gotta make a living, right? She’s getting paid a reported $25K to appear at the Crazy Horse III strip club in Vegas, but she doesn’t have to strip. What’s up with that? Heidi’s getting paid just to host the 3rd anniversary party and doesn’t have to show her size G boobies or anything.

If you were a big fan of “Saved By the Bell” back in the day, didn’t you just love Lisa Turtle? Screech sure did, but she was having none of that. The actress who played Lisa is Lark Voohries, and if you’ve seen her lately, you may be a bit shocked by her appearance. She popped up on the internet not too long ago and her face was unrecognizable. She blamed it on a bad makeup job…but how does Lark explain a recent rambling interview where she mumbled to herself before she stopped talking altogether? Her mom says Lark has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, but Lark says she just has a strong spiritual sense and was pausing to pray.

If you’ve ever been on a Hollywood tour bus, they usually just point out a bunch of houses where celebrities live and hotels where celebrities died. But how lucky was this bus full of tourists when they looked over and saw David Beckham running barefoot through the bushes in nothing but his underwear! David was doing a photo shoot for his H&M underwear line and this bus pulled up at JUST the right time.

Police rushed out to Ashton Kutcher’s home in LA yesterday after police received a teletext message — as if it were coming from a deaf person — from a woman who claimed locked herself in the bathroom because several people in the house had been shot by a group of Russian men who were robbing the house. Police cars and a helicopter swarmed the area and called out the 3 men who were on the property, but they were like, What’s going on???? It turns out these men were simply workers…There was no woman locked in the bathroom…no Russian robbers…It was all a hoax. And police are now looking for the person who did this.

Perhaps Karrueche Tran finally accepted her fate. She tweeted “Bye baby” and a couple of hours later, her (apparently ex) boyfriend Chris Brown showed up with Rihanna for Jay-Z’s concert in NY. Just the night before, Chris and Rihanna reportedly were making out (or whatever!) in the bathroom at the Griffin nightclub, and then last night after they saw Jay-Z, the two of them partied at 1Oak until they left together at 4am.