Big Al’s Blog: Can I make a crying woman laugh?
Big Al’s Blog: Can I make a crying woman laugh?

This girl sent me a text message yesterday asking me if I would ever talk about her on the radio. Wow! I mean there are 2 types of girls out there. One type wants to be talked about on the radio and the other NEVER wants to be talked about on the radio. I think I would prefer the ladder. It’s just a little funny when a girl actually wants to be talked about. Speaking of girls, Honey 3 sent me a text message asking if I wanted to have a drink so she could say bye since she is moving on Saturday. I have not replied to that question one way or the other. I don’t think I will. At this point…I mean why? She has made it pretty clear how she really feels!

So, I was sitting at my favorite dinner spot last night and I couldn’t help but notice that the girl next to me was crying. I mean she had a drink sitting in front of her and she was just bawling, with her hand over her face. So finally I said something to her as I got up to go pee. I said “Excuse me, I’m going to leave my phone on the bar, please don’t steal it.” she laughed a little. Since I got a little laugh, I thought I would follow that up with another line. “And by the way, don’t slip a ruffie in my wine either. I’m watching you.”

I got another laugh. So since I kinda broke the ice, I figured I would find out what the problem was. By the time I returned, she had sat in my seat and started a conversation with the guys to my left, which meant I would have to take her seat. But at least she wasn’t crying. So, a few minutes later, it came out. It was her birthday and her husband had just told her that he was leaving her. Why? Of course I didn’t ask but she wasn’t shy about telling us. She said the reason he said he left was because she gave her bad directions. I responded with another funny, “Bad directions, you sure he didn’t say One Direction?” she was becoming a little less amused with my funny. Then she continued her talk with the other guys. And she told us all that the house was in her name and began talking about how much cash she had. I was on my funny roll so I had to keep trying. I pulled out my phone and began showing her pictures. Yes I was being annoying. But it was on purpose. She would be in the middle of a sentence with the other guys and I would tap her on the shoulder and say, “here is my picture with Coolio.”

She continued to talk and I interrupted again with, “here is my picture with Miniature horses.” This continued on and on and finally my “to go” food came out. I told them all that I was leaving but before I left, I had to show her the picture of the ring I bought honey 3. I said, “You think you have problems, at least you got 6 good months of marriage out of it. Mine turned me down.” Then I showed her a pic of me and the Midgets from Midget wrestling at my bar. She laughed again so I knew it was time to go. Always leave on a high note!