I personally thought my week went pretty well, if I say so myself. I only burned one meal. I didn’t blow the house up. And I did not have to make one single hospital visit. This means, I was winning. Yes, I said was. I will admit it, I had some drinks on Friday to celebrate the fact that I did not blow up my house while Kinsey was gone. I went to Big Al’s bar, I had some fun, I sang some karaoke, I got into a random limo for a nice ride, and I went home in a cab. I also sang an N*sync song with Josh Henderson from that show “Dallas”. Note: don’t sing with people who are professional singers. He blew me out of the water.
I am not conditioned to do that whole going out anymore. So my Saturday morning was not the best. I was not feeling like a champion, and that is ok, because I had all day to rest. Just me, my dog, Dex, and the TV. Well, I let Dex out in the backyard, so he could run around and chase squirrels. He always loses, because they just hop on the fence and run away. They usually run towards the front of the house, and then are gone, and I can tell that Dex feels defeated.. This makes sense later, maybe.
So I fell asleep. I was in my boxers and a T-shirt. This also makes sense in a second. I woke up to the sound of a dog barking in my front yard. In my haze, I look out there, and think, “wow, that dog looks and sounds like Dex.” This dumb dog was, recklessly, chasing squirrels in the street. I thought, “where is this dogs owner? What an idiot!” I sat up and got a better look, and realized it was Dex. Homeboy committed a prison break. He has apparently been planning to chase a squirrel out of the yard for a while, because I found the hole he dug, and it must have taken him a week to get that finished.
My head hurts, but I gotta get Dex, before he gets run over. So I got up, no shoes, no pants, no problem. I opened the door, and yelled his name. He stopped, and looked at me. Dex is a great dog. He always has been. He actually doesn’t do very many things wrong. When I call his name, he listens. This time it was different. He had tasted freedom, so he took off running down the street. Dex is a chihuahua, and is pretty small, but those lil dogs are shifty, and they are pretty dang quick. I had no time to gather shoes, and pants. So I ran after him, hoping to catch him quickly. That did not happen. I turned into the guy in boxer briefs, running after a chihuahua in my neighborhood. Dex got me to run half a block in my underwear. An old lady drove by and gave me the meanest stare… or maybe it was her “lets get it on” face, but either way, it was an angry face. As I picked Dex up, as quickly as I could, I looked up and saw three kids playing in the fron yard of a house about 5 houses down. Great. Now I think I committed a crime. So I jogged back home, Dex in hand, and using my other hand to cover my goodies. Almost made it the whole week without looking stupid.
Good news, my mustache week one has been a great success. A fourteen year old boy said, “nice stache” to me at the store.
Also happy to announce that Kinsey and the kids made it home safely. Chloe looks the same, but Cason made two drastic changes to his look:
1. He chipped his front tooth. Nice. We still dont know when that happened.
2. He got a black eye. He got into a fight with a slide at the playground.
I will take that. I am sure Cason will continue to make changes to his look as he gets older.