How could someone so right be so WRONG? (spoiler alert if you DVR’d Bachelorette)
How could someone so right be so WRONG? (spoiler alert if you DVR’d Bachelorette)

Wow. I never read RealitySteve.com because I really like to watch all “The Bachelor” and “The Bachelorette” episodes in a state of blissful, full-on ignorance. Plus, I get a kick out of live-tweeting all my little sarcastic comments and feeling like I’m part of a little community of that loves to bash this whole concept of made-for-TV love while secretly wishing this was happening to me. Oh well.

Of course, there are always those who try to spoil my fun. I’m like, come on! I had to give up Santa Claus way back in second grade because of some jerky little kid, so can’t I at least have THIS??? And yes, I did have a couple of people post that Brooks was going to come out as Dez’s final choice — people who are now BLOCKED, by the way. Yeah…I blocked their asses. (The preceding comment complete with the vulgar term is compliments of Katie Couric, aka “Potty Mouth.”)

reality86But here’s the thing…I was so bored by Dez and her crop of men that I stopped watching and tweeting a month ago. So while I sorta kinda knew that Brooks was supposed to be the winner, eh. It wasn’t really ruining anything for me because the Bachelorette producers took care of that during casting.

But here were were at the finale and Reality Steve came on our show and got me all pumped up about watching the last episode. And he said — without revealing Dez’s final choice — beyond a shadow of a doubt, Brooks was coming back to the show. And! He said — again, beyond a shadow of a doubt — that he was confident he got her last choice correct.

Now, I didn’t ask, but we all knew he was talking about Brooks, right?

So I’m watching The Bachelorette and there’s no Brooks. She kicks off Drew and she’s left with just Chris, but still, no Brooks. Dez talks herself out of being in love with Brooks and decides, eh! Chris is still here and he’s always been here so I’ll just love the one I’m with. Still, no Brooks. We get to the final rose ceremony. So this is it! We’re all just waiting for Brooks!!! And then? Chris started to propose and Dez stopped him. Now?? Does this mean Brooks is coming now? Um…no. Brooks never came. Dez proclaimed her love for Chris and they got engaged and cut to the live after show. Ah, there’s Brooks.

So RealitySteve.com crashed and I was left no choice but to ask my fellow tweeters if Reality Steve got it right. NO! He got it wrong! He not only thought Brooks would return but that Dez would make him her final choice!

So what went wrong?? Did the producers finally fool Steve? Or! — as one conspiracy theorist posed — did Steve willingly provide misinformation to avoid litigation. Yeah….remember that ugly lawsuit The Bachelor filed against him? Was the public humiliation of getting it completely wrong part of the out-of-court settlement?

Oh, yes. You better believe I’m going to ask him about THAT when we talk to Reality Steve on Tuesday.