Yesterday, I was trying to get to church. I got dressed with some nice linen pants and a linen shirt. its summer time so I thought I’d go a little bit casual. Anyway, I got dressed and I thought that my pants felt a little bit loose. I chalked it up to my recent bike riding. Maybe, I had lost a couple pounds already. Since I normally arrive at church a little bit late, the good parking spots were always gone. I ended up parking about a football field and half away. As I was walking to the church, I seemed like my pants felt a little funny. But since I was late, I didn’t think much about it, I just walked faster. Then as I got to the door of the building, my pants felt really weird so I put both hands on my butt to feel what the problem was. My pants were halfway down my butt. I pulled them up as much as I could but they just fell down. Then as I walked around, I tried to think of a way to hold them up without looking like a weirdo. I even tried holding them up by putting my hands in my pockets and that looked really stupid. So after all of that, I had to turn around and walk back to my truck. Apparently the elastic in the waste had been ruined by all of the dry cleaning. So, no church for me yesterday.
Saturday, I decided to have a restaurant garage sale. I just took all of the stuff that we don’t use and filled the parking lot with it and sold it all for so cheap, I felt bad. and of course, people still want to get more discounts. People are amazing. When something is $2, do you really have to ask if you can have it for $1.50? come on…really?
But other than that, all went well.
I met this girl that is on a dating sight. I don’t really know how we got on this subject of a dating sight but we did. Anyway, she mentioned that she met a guy on there who’s screen name is Asian Justin Beiber. The dude is 40 years old, and that’s his screen name. I just thought that was pretty funny.
Yesterday, I took a 20 mile bike ride and I got so lost. I took a different route to change things up a bit and I ended up in this neighborhood that I had never been through before. And then this group of kids played a joke on me I think or maybe they were lost too. Because I asked them for directions and when I went the way they told me to go, I ended up even more lost than I was before. Damn kids.
Mr. Snoop Dogg is in town. He had a concert about 400 miles south of here a couple days ago and he’s got another one close by this weekend so, I guess he decided to swing by. But I do know for sure that he is definitely in town. How can I get Snoop to come by my bar? Free Weed? Free Cheetos for after the weed? Well, I have called the few people that I know that could possibly have contact with some of his people. I just think it would be really cool to have Snoop Dogg at my bar. I could never afford to have him come do a show so I have to get a little creative. So, I have put out a bounty on him. A friendly bounty. No one needs to kidnap him or anything. I just want him to come by, get a burger and a beer and take a picture with me. so, I am offering a $500 reward to anyone that can convince him to come by while he’s here.